Burlesque – The Borrowed Musical

Burlesque is one of those shows that lacks individuality, borrowing many of its component parts from everywhere else, before starting on a high and then, somehow, taking you on a slow route march to death.

A musical patchwork quilt this ‘bitty’ Steven Antin offering (he wrote and directed the 2010 movie featuring Cher and Christina Aguilera), comprises a series of pastiches and boasts an appallingly weak storyline.

On the one hand it has overtures of Cabaret’s Kit Kat Club – leading lady Tess (aka Faye Brookes) might, at points, have been Sally Bowles or, perhaps, Roxie Hart from Chicago, with smatterings of La Cage Aux Folles, Gypsy and The Bodyguard thrown in for good measure.

It was a bit of ‘everything else’ but lacked individual substance and, in the case of all of the above, each had a more worthy libretto: this one didn’t and, at times, it was like a slow death march as Ali (Gracie O’Brien) builds up enough courage to tell burlesque club owner Tess (Faye Brookes): “I’m your daughter.”

At one point I came close to calling out: “For God’s sake just tell her!” The so-called storyline seemed to get us through the best part of Act II before the cat finally limped from its bag.

But, despite all of that, it was a wonderful cast: not their fault that the charabanc in which they were forced to travel lacked a full set of wheels!

Brookes was the perfect Tess and O’Brien, making her professional debut, had a magnificent, effortless voice that breezed its way through the score, however, challenging it became.

Racky Plews’ direction and Aaron Renfree’s choreography were excellent and there were some great characterisations: Ryan Carter as OTT gay, Sean, club diva, Nikki (Vanessa Ela Young) and Davide Fienauri as Tess’s ex and co-club owner cum bad boy, Vince.

It is raunchy from the out with lots of buttocks straining to leave challenged leotards, whilst a raft of male pecs are equally eager to shake off suggestive trouser braces cramping their style and frustrating the ladies (and a few gents no doubt). However, this does not maketh a good musical.

Yes, there was lots of wolf whistling and leering in the dark, I’m sure, but it takes more than that old theatrical adage – tits and teeth – to deliver a winner. The movie had Cher and Aguilera and the memory of those two will do enough to brighten the smile on the box office manager’s face.

However, not my favourite and feather boas, big busts and skimpy costumes have their limit!


Burlesque:Alhambra Bradford until Sat 26th Sept